Corn MAiZE!

I have created for myself a "30-Year-Old Bucket List" and one of the things on there is to do a Corn Maze. Tonight, I get to victoriously check it off the list since we kicked the corn maze's tushie. I didn't realize you could do the corn maze at night, but I think it really added something to the maze especially since the maize itself was in pretty pitiful shape. The Rock City maze has a "Haunted Forest" also. I have a secret, latent, gripping fear of Haunted Houses that pops up every Halloween. So, the entire trip from the car to the start of the maze was filled with anxiety about accidentally ending up in the haunted forest due to a mislabeled sign or wrong corn maze turn. The journey through the maze was almost without incident until the final stretch when Ben got stuck in some webbing which caused a cornstalk to pop up and hit me in the back. I screamed louder than the Haunted Forest people and they were being chased by a very loud chainsaw.

So, one feature of the corn maze that I could have done without is all the people on their cell phones. I hate cell phones. I saw a group of five teenagers stopped in the middle of a path, all talking on their cell phones. Because obviously people within electronic reach trump people in person, even if you're relying on them to help you get out of a vegetative labyrinth!

My biggest pet peeve is when people answer their phones when they're at dinner with me. Double points if they answer it and have an actual conversation longer than "Hey, I'm at dinner. Can I call you back?" I hate cell phones. Also-when you buy one, they should come with instructions on how to use an "inside voice" when you're talking on them. Its not a transatlantic phone call in the 1950's. Now, every trip to Wendy's or the mall has an auto-babble and bad ring tone soundtrack. People are never talking about anything important, either. We've just all become used to being accessible and therefore in touch with someone, anyone at every point in time. Actually, its worse when people are talking about something important. Once, in Subway, I heard a guy simultaneously order a foot-long sandwich and talk his ex-girlfriend into getting back together with him. Seriously: "Baby, Darnell said that about me, but it wasn't true. We just wasn't gettin' along. It was the sex. You know? Uh...yeah...foot-long club on wheat...No, I got me a job with the city working with a bunch of white folks. I've changed. What? You got braces?! Ohhhh, racist, not braces. Then, yeah."